Masochistic Mondays: week 12

The Stats (October 19, 2009)
Starting Weight: 188 lbs
Current Weight: 183.6 lbs

I'm conflicted.

Disappointed because I've managed to gain a pound and a half back, but excited because I'm really making progress running. I really should have written something Friday night after I got back from my run - the excitement and sense of accomplishment probably would have been a great motivator when I'm really not feeling like going out after work for a run. Instead I'll have to do with these recollections, and tell myself that it was real and that I'm not trying to fool myself.

So my disappointment comes obviously from taking a step backwards. And considering I'm only taking itty bitty steps forward each week, it seem big, really big. I blame two meals at ikea, Little Caesar's pizza & Crazy Bread, and puppy chow. Besides the Crazy Bread incident yesterday, I don't feel like I over did it on any of those "treats" - just them all occurring in two days was too much for the system I guess. I thought I showed excellent restraint (except for the Crazy Bread), but obviously not enough. It stinks a bit because I definitely went to bed hungry both Saturday & Sunday, like stomach getting ready to growl hungry. Live and learn (hopefully). Though I'm really bad at that learning part when there's left over pizza in the house - it calls my name for breakfast (small victory, I only ate one slice and didn't eat the crust - granted it's not not-eating-the-cheese but it's something).

Ok, ok. I'm gonna stop beating up on myself now and focus on things more positive that will hopefully carry me through the week.

Last week's 5k training start off well. I went Monday and cut another minute and a half off my time, and extended the amount of time I was actually running straight by 3 minutes. Then Wednesday came. We've had a couple weeks (it seems) of nearly constant rain or rather gloom interspersed with bouts of rain showers. Plus it has been unseasonable chilly, we definitely missed out on nice fall days this year. Needless to say, the weather has had an affect on my mood, so come Wednesday after work, I had zero motivation to even push myself upstairs to change, let alone out the door.

To make up for it, though, I made sure to go out Friday night after work, despite wanting the weekend to just begin. And you know what? It actually felt good to go running. Granted, about a mile into my course, I began to feel like it was time to walk, but I kept on with my "just until the next stoplight" method that has proven to be a good motivator. When I realize I can make it to the next stoplight without dying, I say just until the next one and before I know it it's time to stop. As time goes on, the one mile despair still hits, but I'm finding shortly after I hit a stride and by the time I'm coming up on my "one minute left" warning I'm not wishing (begging) to stop - thinking I'm going to die. And to make things even better on Friday, I managed to run a bit more after taking my official cool down. All in all, I ran 2.5 of my 3.2 mile course. I wasn't able to cut my time, it actually went up by a minute, but I felt good - so I'm guessing the cold weather slowed me up.

I'm beginning to think I might just be able to run an entire 5k come the race in November. This week my training has me going up to 30 minutes of continuous running, so we'll see how far that takes me. I'm really glad I plotted the 3.2 mile course, it's nice to see the actually progress I'm making, trying to pass the previous run's stopping cool down point. It's like a challenge.

Oh! One other exciting running note. I think my form is even improving! When I began, I could feel my body start to hunch or bend to one side as I started to get tired. My feet were tough to pick off the ground and I'm pretty sure I looked like an 80 year old shuffling. But I noticed on Friday that I'm not feeling those things anymore and when I'd catch a glimpse of myself in a shop window, I was more erect. And though my strides aren't long, fast and efficient, they are getting longer and higher - I bet you could even see space between my foot and the ground now while I'm running ;)